“I never said that!!” – What is Gaslighting?

Have you ever heard?

  • “I never said that”
  • “You’re imagining things”
  • “I didn’t do that”
  • “You are being paranoid”
  • “I always make an effort, you just never bother”
  • “You’re imagining things”
  • “I was just joking”
  • “You twist things”
  • “That never happened”
  • “You need help”

Sounding familiar?

Gaslighting is a term that seems to appear quite often now, compared to 5 years ago. It is a term that basically means a person is being made to question their own sanity and the world they are living in. It can be described as “walking on eggshells.” Gaslighting can cause a person to completely lose trust, not only in others around them, whether strangers or not, but in themselves.

In my case I truly realised I was being gaslit towards the end of my marriage (especially after I left-Everything sort of clicked). Once I knew my wife was interested in someone else. Despite me having clear evidence of the behaviour it was denied, I was told I was overreacting, twisting words and imagining things. Long story short, I was not, what I had heard and found was indeed true. However it often is the case that until a relationship is struggling, or ending/ended you really do not realise how manipulated you truly were.

Once I had left my home, so much started to make sense, I really started to come to the realisation that pretty much the whole time I knew this person, it was one big fake lie.

Many people who are being gaslit may not even realise it themselves. Which can cause problems if others question the situation they are in, simply because it will be denied. It may be “normal” to them.

The best thing to do is support them the best you can. One day they will be grateful for that support. They will need that safe person – that believes their truth.

Published by

StazieMai

All Views are my own.

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