BSc (Hons) Open Student at The Open University (Final Academic Year = 2021 – 2022). BSc (Hons) Nursing (Adult) Student at University (Final [3rd] Year = Currently deferred). Student Leadership Academy (Swansea University) 2020 Participant. #FutureLeaders Health Care Support Worker. Chihuahua, Chorkie, Rankin Dragon and Tortoise Mami. Currently Divorcing. On a Healing Journey. Baby Witch Learning about Wicca.
As May is Mental Health Awareness Month, I had an idea to write a letter each day to a person, or group of people that have had an impact on my own personal health. The first portion of the month has been delayed, however I hope that I will catch up and there will be a daily post. Thank You for taking the time to read these and I appreciate any comments or support you can provide on each post.
Please remember that if you are struggling with your health, both physical or mental, there may be some triggers in these letters-please seek support if you find these letters trigger any distress. Look after yourself!!
Letter 17 – To the younger me
If I could go back and tell my ‘younger self’ something, it would be;
“Stand up for yourself, Leave and don’t be scared.”
This post is very short and to the point, but I watched something the other day and they were talking about their younger self and regrets, and it got me thinking about what I would tell my younger self. I had great moments in my childhood but I also had terrible times-By the time I hit my teens, I had experienced so much more than many people my age and I had to mature very quickly.
Maybe take a moment now and think about what you would tell your ‘younger self’.
Due to my complex life history and reasons, I have only just started to explore my past in depth, I never grieved 15 years ago. With everything that has gone on in the last 2 years, my feelings of grief have only just emerged and I am starting the process 15 years on and getting help from available services where I can.
If you are grieving some time after losing someone I have learnt not to feel ashamed for your grief, there were several things stopping me from grieving years ago, it is not my fault I could not explore my feelings and I was not old enough or strong enough to stand up for myself. But I still deserve to grieve. We all do.
Yesterday’s daily word prompt was elaborate;
So I guess my contribution to the topic of elaboration involves my theory surrounding my grief. My childhood wasn’t necessarily unhappy, at the time anyway. Years on I have realised that certain things that happened and ways I was treated were not ‘normal’ and where definitely a cause for concern. I have had a complicated life, exploring it was always going to be a big job but writing this blog does help that. Maybe nobody sees this page, or comments, follows or supports it. But it is my story. My truth. I am not twisting or manipulating the truth, I have been lied to most of my life and I intend to live an honest life. If you do not like it then I am sorry. This is me.